Some time ago, I looked outside to watch the kids play.  They were laughing and running.  They were playing football, so there was an occasional tackle.  When they tackled each other, it resulted in rolling on the ground on top of each other with huge laughs all the while.  Then, they would get up and go at it again. . . never without a smile.  Watching them brought a smile to my lips as the thought crossed my mind that they really loved each other, were truly best friends, and they would always have each other.  They will love each other and help each other through school, other so-called friends, relationships, sins, hard times, and anything that comes up.  That thought gives me comfort knowing that even when I’m no longer around as a mother, they will have each other.  Brothers and sisters are your witness, your partner in crime, your midnight companion.  They are your comforters, role models, motivators, allies.  They may be the only someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark, and they may be the only one to sense when you need a shoulder to cry on.  They are your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink.  They are your best friend.  I’ve read proverbs that say that siblings are as close as hands and feet and that a sibling shares childhood memories and grown-up dreams.  Susan Scarf Merrel says that, “Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk.”  I will fail miserably as a mother in so many ways, but aside from teaching my children about a relationship with Jesus, my greatest accomplishment as a mother will be to see my children remain best friends and truly rely on each other through every step of their life.

The bond between brothers and sisters can not be explained to anyone without a sibling.  It is the longest lasting relationship most people have – longer than friends, parents or even spouses.  It may weaken in periods throughout their lives, but it always remains and even intensifies through aging.  The sibling relationship can even be restored after major fights that would have friends separated for life.  I pray this bond will develop and remain with my kids.  I pray that they always love each other and lean on each other and never take it for granted.

Seeing my kids playing also brought tears to my eyes as I prayed that they would always have each other . . . because even though they have each other now, I have learned in such a brutal manner the last several years that that may not always be the case.  The last few weeks I keep replaying a scene in my head.  I remember the night in the hospital that the doctors came out and told us that Daro wouldn’t make it through the night. I remember walking outside with Clendon in just utter shock.  Daro wasn’t even 20 yet.  This wasn’t supposed to happen.  I remember Clendon and me just sitting on the curb crying and holding each other.  I remember thinking that at least Clendon and I would still have each other.  Not too long before that I remember a girl from church dying and thinking how sad it was that her sister was now an only child.  And, I remember thinking that no one should have to go through the pain of this feeling in your chest, the pain in my mind of the thought that your brother or sister may not be around, the pain in your heart of a friendship that should last well into old age is ending much too early.  And yet, here I am just a few years later with that pain that is all too familiar once again in my mind, my heart, my very soul.  Is there anyway I can go through all this again?  It’s so hard to put down the bitterness and anger and stay positive and hopeful.  When we found out that Clendon had cancer, I remember someone telling me, “Remember that God doesn’t give you anything you’re not strong enough to handle, and I’m beginning to think that you guys are one strong family.”  Well, I’m tired of being so strong.  For once I just want to throw up my arms and say, “I quit.”  But, I can’t.  I love my brother too much to do that.  That would be the easy thing to do . . . things most friends would do because they just don’t know what to say or do.  But, I’m more than a friend. . . I’m his sister.  And, in those happy moments playing football in the backyard, I’m hoping that is what my kids are learning.

            Sweet is the voice of a sister in the season of sorrow. ~ Benjamin Disraeli

            When mom & dad don’t understand, a sister always will. ~ Unknown

Help your brother’s boat across, and your own will reach the shore. ~ Hindu Proverb

            The mildest, drowsiest sister has been known to turn tiger if her sibling is in trouble. ~ Clara Ortega

A brother is a friend given by Nature. ~ Jean Baptiste Legouve

            I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see.

I sought my God, but my God eluded me.

I sought my brother and found all three. ~ Unknown

            All for one and one for all

            My brother and my friend

            What fun we have

            The times we share

            Siblings ‘til the end. ~ Unknown

            A sibling may be the keeper of one’s identity, the only person with the keys to one’s unfettered, more fundamental self. ~ Marian Sadmaier

            To the outside world we all grow old.  But not to brothers and sisters.  We know each other as we always were.  We know each other’s hearts.  We share private family jokes.  We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys.  We live outside the touch of time.  ~ Clara Ortega

            There’s no other love like the love for a brother.

            There’s no other love like the love from a brother. ~ Astrid Alauda

             Blessed is the servant who loves his brother as much as when he is sick and useless as when he is well and is of service to him. ~ St. Francis of Assisi